Chapter 81: Ten Thousand Miles (9)
The Moonlight Pavilion instantly fell into complete silence. Everyone, including Gao Xianzhi and Li Huaizhong, furrowed their brows.
Li Huaizhong was of Hu descent and naturally did not embrace the Confucian concepts of benevolence and righteousness. In his view, women were like food and drink—essential parts of life. Sending beautiful women to accompany distinguished guests at banquets was a perfectly normal practice. To him, as long as his goals could be achieved, it didn’t matter how many women he sent away.
He glanced secretly at Li Kuo and sneered inwardly—just a child, certainly not worth considering in any plans!
His invitation to Gao Xianzhi was part of a two-step strategy. Now, Li Kuo’s actions were clearly pushing him into a dead end, leaving him no chance to turn things around. “This is your doing—don’t blame me later!”
Li Huaizhong continued to fiddle with his jade cup, studying Gao Xianzhi thoughtfully to see how the Grand Protector of Anxi would handle the situation. Gao Xianzhi seemed to notice the awkward atmosphere as well and cleared his throat several times.
“General Li Kuo, we are here today for King Li’s private banquet. The rules here are different from those in the army—there’s no need to be so rigid.”
His tone carried an undercurrent of displeasure. How could Li Kuo not notice? But the young man refused to back down. He straightened his back and argued, “Commander Gao, if King Li had invited ordinary singers and dancers to liven things up, that would be fine. But these girls—their clothing is simply too…”
He stopped speaking, his face red, fists clenched. Though he was already married and experienced all kinds of intimate matters between men and women, he truly couldn’t bring himself to openly embrace a woman in public.
“Enough! You’re here for a banquet, not to find faults. Besides, guests should follow the host’s rules. Since we’re in the Kingdom of Julan, we must abide by their customs.”
Li Kuo’s behavior had crossed his limits. When it came to courting women, Gao Xianzhi was an experienced hand. The rule against hiring prostitutes in the army was just that—a rule set by humans. As long as one’s actions didn’t affect military affairs, there was nothing wrong with it. In Gao Xianzhi’s eyes, a man should focus all his energy on achieving greatness, leaving trivial matters unattended. Moreover, he needed to leverage the resources of Julan City to rally his scattered troops, so he had to maintain good relations with Li Huaizhong. With Li Kuo’s interference, his already difficult situation might become even worse.
Gao Xianzhi suddenly stopped in his tracks and snapped, “If you feel unwell, you’re free to step back. But don’t ruin everyone’s enjoyment by staying here.” His words were extremely arrogant, even Li Siyeh beside him found it hard to tolerate. After all, Gao Xianzhi was the supreme commander, and they had to give him face in front of outsiders. As for Li Kuo, he was indeed being too pedantic. After all, this was a matter among men—what harm could it do to take a slight advantage? Was it worth causing rifts with potential allies over some trivial teachings from a sage?
The young man felt a pang of pain in his heart and shook his head helplessly. His pain wasn’t due to Gao Xianzhi’s rude and cold attitude toward him, but rather over the fate of the Anxi Army. He had thought that despite their crushing defeat at Talas, the army still had a solid foundation. With Gao Xianzhi rallying them and them enduring hardship for three to five years, there might still be a chance to make a comeback.
But with Gao Xianzhi indulging in beauty and pleasure like this, when would he focus on reorganizing the demoralized troops and training them? If the Anxi Army continued in this chaotic state, they might not even be able to survive, let alone seek revenge or serve their country loyally.
After all, those 30,000 troops outside Talas were the elite of the Anxi Army—Gao Xianzhi’s trump card! If even such a disciplined army suffered a crushing defeat, how could one expect those disorganized remnants to defeat the mighty Persian cavalry?
Sometimes, one isn’t defeated by others but by oneself!
If that was the case, then what was the point of leading an ambush on Suiye back then? What was the point of rushing to Talas at Gao Xianzhi’s request for help? It didn’t matter if a person was injured or disabled—as long as they had fighting spirit and a sense of shame, they had a chance to prove themselves again. But if a person’s heart was dead, they were utterly ruined, with no chance of turning things around!
The Anxi generals before him gave him the impression of giving up on themselves. Failure wasn’t scary; what was scary was not daring to face one’s own mistakes! How could the Anxi Army be like this? How could Tang soldiers be like this?
The young man could no longer suppress his anger. With a scoff, he said, “If I’m such a worthless subordinate, I won’t stay here to annoy General Gao and the brothers. You go ahead!” Without looking back, he swept away, ignoring the attempts of his military friends to stop him, and left Mingyue Pavilion.
The atmosphere in the Mingyue Pavilion became extremely awkward. A deep dark line appeared on Gao Xianzhi’s face. How dare this kid talk back to him like this! If it had happened at any other time, it might have been fine, but it happened right in front of King Julan, Li Huaizhong—how could he maintain face under such circumstances?
Yes, this kid had personally led an army to save his life. But that didn’t mean he could ignore military rules and deliberately defy his superiors! Those who dared speak to Gao Xianzhi like this never ended up well, yet this person had actually saved his life…
Seeming to notice Gao Xianzhi’s distress, Li Siye patted King Julan’s arm and laughed heartily, saying, “King Li, don’t mind him. My brother just has such a personality—he can’t stand any disrespect. We always tease him about this, but he just won’t change. Don’t worry about it.”
With his interference, Li Huaizhong couldn’t stay too stern. He simply smiled and said, “As General Siye says, do I really seem like someone with a narrow mind? Governor Li was just joking with me. Can’t I tell right from wrong?”
He deliberately emphasized the last sentence, as if everything was under his control. Although Li Siye was angry inside, he had no choice but to force a smile.
“Enough of this. Today, King Li has specially prepared a feast for us. We must not leave until we’re drunk!”
Seeing that Li Siye had made things easier for him, Gao Xianzhi decided to go along with it.
Then, the Grand Protector of Anxi raised his jade cup and said, “Come, drink this cup to the bottom!”
“How could I dare disobey the orders of the Grand Protector?” Li Huaizhong replied, imitating the manner of scholars from the Central Plains and saying something highly characteristic of the Tang Dynasty, which made everyone in the pavilion laugh.
“Come, finish this cup!”
“We won’t leave until we’re drunk! Cheers!” …
Outside the military camp gate, it was quiet and cold.
Li Kuo sat alone by an earthen wall, gazing blankly at the starry sky.
Ever since returning from the Mingyue Pavilion, he had been sitting here by himself, slowly recalling the past years, the people, and the events in Chang’an. Once one settles down, no matter how far away they are, they can’t help but think about what they’ve done recently. Things done well are naturally worth reliving, while those done poorly bring regret.
Some things cannot and will not be forgotten; some feelings need not nor can they be expressed!
A sweet and innocent smile, along with a fried egg filled with the aroma of oil, brought back memories of his childhood. Whether it was the smiles exchanged after enjoying food at the yakkan stall in Xisi Archway, the carefree moments of wading in the water by the Wei River on the outskirts of the city to catch fish and crabs, or the wild dancing and singing on Zhuque Street during the Lantern Festival, every moment of his childhood came vividly to mind. Every plant and building in Chang’an had deeply penetrated the young man’s blood.
Was that person in Chang’an city doing well?
Gradually, Li Kuo felt his eyelids growing heavy, and before he knew it, he fell into a sweet dream.
A Tian’s figure gradually faded away, replaced by the sight of his mother’s hunched back. At some point, her gray hair had covered her forehead, even the last strands of black hair at her temples turning frosty.
His mother turned slightly and handed him a fur coat. “It’s cold outside. Remember to wear more clothes. This cotton coat was made for you by your mother last year. It might be a bit small, but it’s definitely thick and warm.”
He tried to take it, but found the coat to be intangible. As soon as he approached, it vanished like air.
“Mom knows she can’t keep you. You’ve always been proud since you were young. If you can endure it in the army, do so; if not, discuss it with your comrades. Young people are hot-tempered—be understanding of each other! In our Li family, only you have been born as an only child for three generations. If…”
At this point, Lady Li Lu’s figure gradually became translucent and disappeared into the twilight.
“Mom!”
Li Kuo cried out, venting all his distress.
“I don’t want to be at odds with them either, but the country is falling apart. If things continue like this, I’m afraid… I’m afraid…”
Tears filled his eyes, but the young man stubbornly wiped them away, refusing to let even a single tear fall.
Suddenly, he saw a familiar figure leaning under the big locust tree in the front yard of the old house in Chongren Archway, smiling as he watched him. Yet he couldn’t make out his face—it was so blurred that he couldn’t identify who it was.
Suddenly, the young man seemed to notice something about the person’s clothing and stepped forward suspiciously.
The person was wearing a thick, dark robe similar to his third brother’s, with a simple black square headscarf tied casually around it! It must be his third brother, it has to be!…