Chapter Ten: The Golden Palace (IV)

A heavy snow covered the world in ice.
Faint snow adorned the greenery; weary stoves waited for spring. It was a time when souls were overwhelmed—only wild songs could soothe them!
Such passionate verses could never exist in Chang’an.
The first month had passed, and another year had begun. Entering the tenth year of the Tianbao era, Chang’an remained unchanged, just as it always had been. Vendors selling sheep jelly still called out their wares with care, though the customers were now unfamiliar faces. By the old locust tree at the end of the alley, young men and girls still met after dusk, their faces even more delicate and youthful.
Music played where music should, dances took place where dances were due. In the wealthy homes, there was still the smell of meat and wine, while by the roadsides, frozen corpses littered the ground.
People had grown accustomed to this somewhat lazy atmosphere. If given a choice, most of them would prefer to continue living in such a languid environment.
They woke up at dawn with drumbeats, washed up, packed their belongings, and went out to work. They lazily watched the sun rise high in the sky and then lazily watched it set, before returning home contentedly.
Because they were so accustomed to it, even the slightest change disrupted this delicate balance, making things seem less harmonious and provoking the nerves of ordinary people.
The most obvious cause of such change was war.
Recent successive victories had given the people of Chang’an a sense of relief. They no longer had to worry about Tibetan raids or Turkic ambushes. They lived in an invincible nation that provided them with a strong sense of security. Whether true or not, in the eyes of the people of Chang’an, no barbarian would dare to challenge the might of the Tang Dynasty.
Yet, compared to border conflicts, they were more interested in who had married a beautiful bride or who had received praise from a private tutor. Stories about someone’s doorstep being splashed with dirty water or a dead cat hung on a shop’s sign were also widely discussed.
They would always trace the origins, analyze each detail, and arrive at a seemingly reasonable conclusion. They would call it “kindness.”
But don’t expect their “kindness” to be used for good purposes.
If an old woman was stabbed while buying vegetables and her money stolen, it would surely be them standing by idly. If a horse from a wealthy household trampled on a vendor’s goods, it would still be them rushing to grab the scattered items.
In any case, these were all part of Chang’an.

You might hate such a Chang’an City—hate this grid-like, orderly layout, hate the hidden, sordid, and dark motives lurking within, and hate those lifeless, yellow-faced people who seem to have lost their parents. But this is Chang’an City, the real Chang’an City, unadorned by government embellishments. As long as you live here, you can only endure, adapt, and be assimilated… Du Jingtian was undoubtedly tired of this life, especially after losing the person she loved most—that damned Xiao Qi whom she constantly cursed. She had hoped to see her husband among the Anxi troops returning to the capital, waiting at the city gate all afternoon, counting the heads on the horses, yet never spotting that annoying face. That guy didn’t even take the chance to come back and see her or his mother—what a heartless wretch. Naturally, she felt distressed, so she gathered with Li Niang and Lady Li Lu, ordered a meal from a restaurant on the street using the maids in the household, and barely managed to have a family-style meal on New Year’s Eve. Lady Li Lu, having seen much of the world, wasn’t saddened at all but instead comforted Du Jingtian. Unable to bear to see her upset, Du Jingtian verbally promised to stop thinking about it, though deep down she still felt pain. Now, Du Jingtian regretted not practicing calligraphy seriously in her childhood. Though women didn’t have to take the imperial examinations, knowing a few characters was still useful. At least now she didn’t have to struggle over writing letters to Xiao Qi. Should she ask Li Niang to help write them? Though their relationship was decent, it wasn’t close enough for her to confide in her… After the fifteenth day passed, Du Jingtian couldn’t hold back any longer. She took the opportunity to visit relatives to meet Li Zigu, the third brother of the Li family, and asked him to use his connections to get in touch with Cen Shen, the secretary of the Anxi army. Cen Shen and Gao Shi were close friends. Upon hearing that Lady Li had come, he immediately went to meet her from the Anxi court, and after some polite exchanges, the two entered the inner hall. “Secretary Cen, my husband often stays at the border with no one to take care of him. I hope you can look after him a bit.” Suddenly, Du Jingtian became so reserved that even she felt uncomfortable. She twisted her hands, pressed her lips together, and lowered her head. At first, she was too shy to ask Cen Shen directly about her husband’s whereabouts. After some hesitation, Cen Shen saw through her intentions and spoke plainly. “Lady Li, don’t worry. Your husband has only been in Anxi for a year, yet he has already achieved great military exploits. Such talent will surely lead to success in the future.”

Cen Shen stroked his beard and smiled faintly.
Learning that her husband was safe in Anxi, merely because Gao Xianzhi had ordered him to stay in Shule, her worries and resentment toward him diminished somewhat. Desiring to hear more about Anxi from Cen Shen, she politely began chatting with him.
From Cen Shen’s words, she learned that the northwest borders of the Tang Empire were not peaceful, and that the Anxi army had to defend areas spanning three or four provinces with forces of forty to fifty thousand men.
Furthermore, she learned that the actual Arab armies were not as weak as the court portrayed to the people; in some aspects, they even surpassed the Tang forces. She also learned that the Tang troops in Anxi were not very popular among the local people, and the reputation of the Heavenly Khan was not enough to make the barbarian chiefs weep and kneel in submission at the mere mention of his name.
Gradually, Cen Shen’s voice became blurred and faint, leaving Du Jingtian feeling a dull ache in her head.
All those things she had heard and seen since childhood, considered true, were now dismissed as lies by Cen Shen, leaving her deeply disappointed.
Everything the court promoted was like the smooth, perfect surface of the sand dunes in Puchang Sea—appealing but not genuine. Once turned over, what people saw was a rough, ugly surface full of pits and sand.
Du Jingtian gradually understood why her husband had insisted on leaving—some dark sides of this golden city were not as perfect as they seemed in daylight!
After bidding farewell to Cen Shen in haste, Du Jingtian returned to her home in Qinren Fang.
Day after day, night after night passed.
Du Jingtian suddenly felt she too wanted to escape this city, this city worshipped by countless people. But she couldn’t escape—some invisible force seemed to bind her tightly.
She couldn’t understand why she felt such guilt. Didn’t Xiao Qi also escape from Chang’an? Why could he leave so resolutely and without remorse? This doubt was resolved only at the end of April, when Cen Shen came in a hurry to say goodbye.
“I was asked by Lord Li to convey this message to Lady Li: ‘If our Tang Empire wishes to preserve its legacy for thousands of years, it must bloom swiftly, just as flowers emerge when the time is right!’ He said you would understand his difficulties after hearing this. My memory failed me for a moment due to my busy schedule—I forgot to mention it. Only now, as I was leaving, did I remember and rushed over.”
After a brief pause, Cen Shen added, “War has broken out in the west again. I must return to Anxi as soon as possible with General Gao! Goodbye!”
Cen Shen bowed to Du Jingtian, mounted his horse, and rode away.
It turned out he wasn’t fleeing—he had chosen to take on another responsibility!

A sweet smile appeared on Du Jingtian’s lips, and all her grievances and complaints vanished in an instant. At this moment, she neither wanted nor would flee; she wanted to stay here, in the city of Chang’an, and silently pray for her husband. She only wished to be lost in the night of Chang’an, forever drunk in its beauty.
The imperial carriage turned back, and the Milky Way stretched across the sky once more. The solitary phoenix flew toward the Western Sea, while the wild geese left the Northern Ocean!
That year, the Great Tang was invaded by its eastern neighbors, who swept through the former lands of Hezhong.
Note 1: In ancient times, a wife would refer to her husband as “waizi” in front of others.