Chapter 77: The Great Thief (II)

“Look at her! What does she have that resembles a noble consort?”
Yang Zhao was so angry that his beard trembled as he pointed at the Noble Consort of Guo and shouted.
“Yes, I may not resemble a noble consort, but do you even have a hint of the appearance of a grand chancellor of the Tang Dynasty? Since the Tang Dynasty was established, no chancellor has ever sent his sister to another minister’s bed!”
Yang Huahua wasn’t about to back down either and retorted sharply. Yang Zhao treated her merely as a tool, handing her over to others just to advance his own career.
“You… you!”
Hearing such insults, Yang Zhao’s face turned as red as a pig’s liver. After all, he was a grand chancellor—how could he be mocked and cursed like this? If she weren’t his sister, he would have ordered someone to kill her on the spot.
“Well, now you know shame? Why didn’t you blush when you pushed me into the beds of princes and nobles?”
Yang Huahua glared at him fiercely, refusing to give Yang Zhao any face. Scoundrels remain scoundrels—no matter how fancy their clothes, they can’t hide their filthy nature!
“Enough! Stop talking!”
Yang Yuhuan wiped the tears from her cheeks. With just one shout, she silenced all the Yang family members present.
“This is a moment of life and death for our Yang family. Put aside your petty thoughts. If I fall, I doubt you’ll still have the energy to argue here!”
After all, Yang Yuhuan was a noble consort. Her natural authority, gained from years in high position, made everyone defer to her.
Yang Zhao shrugged and smiled brightly. “I was just joking with Huahua.”
“Who has the mood to joke with you?”
Yang Huahua wasn’t grateful at all. She snapped back and turned away.
“The situation isn’t yet beyond repair.”
Yang Yuhuan sighed, a trace of disappointment flashing across her beautiful face.
“I asked General Gao. After visiting that palace maid that night, Third Brother hasn’t summoned any other concubine. It seems he hasn’t fallen for someone else—he just can’t get rid of these rumors.”
“Of course. Fourth Sister is peerlessly beautiful—far beyond ordinary palace maids.”
Yang Zhao swallowed hard and praised her.
“Stop talking nonsense. Focus on how to get the Emperor to take the Empress back!”
The Noble Consort of Qin cut in with a suggestion. As another woman, she understood women’s suffering all too well. Even if you gain a man’s favor temporarily, if things go wrong between you—no matter how long it lasts—the one who ends up hurt is always the woman.

This awkward period is short; men can’t feel the sorrow of losing you. If it lasts longer, it’s likely the man will fall in love with another woman and forget you. Moreover, this man is like an emperor with a harem of beauties—how many are waiting for such an opportunity, how many hoping to become the second concubine?
“There is indeed a way, but…”
Yang Zhao seemed to think of something, hesitated for a moment, but then kept his words to himself.
“Why are you so hesitant? Hurry up and speak!”
Lady Han Guo nudged Yang Zhao with her elbow, nearly spitting in the face of the Grand Minister of the Tang Dynasty.
“Ah, sister.”
Yang Zhao wiped the spit from his face and forced a smile: “Though these men may seem heartless sometimes, it’s because they’re under pressure. In truth, most men still cherish their past relationships.”
“In a few days, it will be Lesser New Year’s Eve. If I devise a plan to get the emperor out of the palace and he happens to see the concubine dancing gracefully, I guarantee he’ll take her back to the palace right away!”
With his rich experience, Yang Zhao offered a quite feasible suggestion. Yet, though good, it still needed many refinements. When the emperor would leave the palace, whether in disguise or formally, which route to take to Yang’s residence, and under what circumstances he would meet the concubine—all required further discussion to finalize.
“I’ll leave this task to Brother Zhao.”
Yang Yuhuan nodded at Yang Zhao and smiled gracefully. …
“The weather is dry—be careful of fires!”
The night was dark, the moon bright. The night watchman knocked on his gong, walking unsteadily along the streets of Qinren Fang. As the year neared its end, even he felt a sense of joy. Having a few drinks from time to time made life quite pleasant.
“Uh.”
After burping, the watchman muttered to himself. Though life was pleasant, it was also too idle. Patrolling all day almost drove one crazy. The security in Chang’an was impeccable—after a curfew, not only were there no people on the streets, not even a chicken could be seen. What was the point of patrolling then?
It would be better to give an early holiday so he could go home and spend time with his wife and children.
“Huh!”
The watchman felt a cold wind sweep past his back and instinctively turned around, but saw nothing unusual.
What the hell!
“The weather is dry—be careful of fires!”
Under the moonlight, the watchman’s shadow grew longer and longer until it disappeared at the end of the street.
Two masked men in black landed lightly on the ground, exchanged glances, nodded, and rushed forward in a crouched posture.

They raced along the walls of the residential districts, as swift as hares and as agile as raccoon cats. With cover provided by the buildings, they could move slowly without being easily spotted. The Jinwu Guard conducted patrols in shifts by district, so they were well aware of when there was no patrol activity.

The master had entrusted such an important task to these two, and they absolutely could not disappoint him.

Upon arriving at a grand courtyard with a red gate, they glanced up at the plaque and immediately leaped onto the roof. The layout of the courtyards in Chang’an was extremely orderly, allowing them to move swiftly along the rooftops. Pulling out the map of the mansion, they compared it briefly before heading due north again.

The boots they wore had cotton soles covered with another layer of kudzu fabric, ensuring no sound was made even while walking on the roofs. Suddenly, one of them stopped and pressed his left ear against the tiles. After listening for a while, he nodded at his companion, drew a dagger from his boot, and pried open a few tiles. Through the gap, he clearly saw what was inside. To the north lay a carved bed, slightly further away was a black ebony table, and further south was a six-panel screen. Everything matched exactly what the master had described—it must be here.

He took out a tube about the thickness of a finger from his sleeve and inserted it through the tiles.

“Huh!”

With a gentle blow, a wisp of white smoke flowed into the room through the tube.

“Sss!” “Sss!”

The dagger pierced through the hardened putty and pried open more tiles. The two exchanged a glance and swiftly leaped into the room like agile monkeys. ……

Early the next morning, a large crowd gathered in front of the door of Qinren District. Men, women, and children gathered around, pointing at a naked man tied to the door. His hands were tied behind his back, and he hung from the door frame, struggling desperately to call for help. But his mouth was clearly stuffed, and a dirty black cloth covered his head, making his cries barely audible.

The people of Chang’an hadn’t seen such a sensational sight in ages. Though it was a man, it satisfied many with peculiar tastes. Many unmarried girls looked up at him, their gazes inevitably falling on his lower body. Strangely enough, though they had no malicious intent, they covered their eyes as soon as their eyes met that sensitive area and dared not look again. After a while, they peeked through their fingers at his lower body once more.

It seems men and women really are different after all…

From the first men gathering in the early morning to the crowd blocking the streets, not a single person went to report the incident to the authorities. In their eyes, this man might be a bandit trying to steal from wealthy households. Since his skills were not good enough and he was caught by the household owners, those wealthy people, unwilling to report him, came up with this method to humiliate him. After all, which wealthy family doesn’t have dozens of guards?

In the end, it was the officials of Qinren Fang who decided to order that the unfortunate man be released. When the guards removed the hood from his head, everyone gasped in shock.

This man was none other than Yang Xuan, the eldest son of the current Left Chancellor Yang Zhao!

How could Lord Yang end up stripped naked and hung in front of the gate?

No one cared about why this happened; they were only concerned that such a high-ranking official could be dragged out of bed and tied naked in public.

The funniest part was that the servants of the Yang family didn’t realize Lord Yang had disappeared until a maid was cleaning the house and found that her master was nowhere to be found. Yet the door was locked from the inside and the windows were barred—could it be that the master had grown wings and flown away?

The news spread faster than the imperial edicts. In just half a day, every teahouse, tavern, street, and alley in Chang’an knew about Lord Yang Xuan’s embarrassing situation.

As the old saying goes, good fortune never comes alone, nor does misfortune. Just as the Imperial Concubine had been sent back to her family, the eldest son of the Yang family was tied up in front of the gate like a pig as revenge. The Yang family truly had no face left these days.

When Chancellor Yang Zhao heard the news, he was so angry he could hardly breathe. This was a huge humiliation. Yang Xuan was his most prized son, and after this incident, not only did Yang Xuan lose all his authority as an official, but even Chancellor Yang Zhao felt his own prestige diminished.

“If I knew who you are, I’d peel your skin off!”
Yang Zhao slammed the desk violently, his eyes blazing with fierce intensity.